Tuesday, August 31, 2010
~ From Anne of Avonlea
Written by LM Montgomery
One step and then another,
and the longest walk is ended;
One stitch and then another,
and the largest rent is mended;
One brick upon another,
and the highest wall is made;
One flake upon another,
And the deepest snow is laid.
So the little coral workers,
By the slow and constant motion,
Have built those pretty islands
In the distant dark blue ocean.
And the noblest undertakings
Man's wisdom has conceived,
By the oft-repeated effort,
Have been patiently achieved.
Then do not look disheartened
On the work you have to do,
And say that such a mighty task
You never can get through ;
But just endeavor day by day
another point to gain,
And soon the mountain which you feared
Will prove to be a plain.
Rome was not builded in a day,
The ancients proverb teaches;
And Nature, by her trees and flowers,
The same sweet sermon preaches.
Think not of far off duties,
But duties which are near;
And, having once begun to work,
Resolve to persevere.
*** Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might...
"What can be more satisfying than to make a 'To Do List' and slowly, but surely put a long bold mark through each task as it is finished!"
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
This weekend my sisters and I were talking late into the night. This often happens when Rich and Sarah come down for the weekend. It is a time for us to catch up on everything and share what we've been learning, how we've been... it seems so many things can happen from one weekend to the next!
Any way tho! There we all were sitting around the living room about midnight, when we heard creaking coming from the hall upstairs. We all went deathly silent and listened for where the creaks were going...they seemed to be coming from Dad and Mom's room and were moving down the hall now. Uh Oh! We were about to be found out. The creaks came half way down the stairs and suddenly stopped... had we heard wrong?? We all turned in our seats and looked towards the stairway... there is a slight bend up our stairs at the landing and we can't see around it from the living room, but as we looked we almost had to rub our eyes and look again. Then we started to laugh... "Mama? "
There she was peering around the corner and smiling at us. It was so funny we couldn't help ourselves, she looked so sweet and funny just standing there peeking around at us.
Mama came down the stairs and joined Sarah, Liz and I, and I think we had one of the funnest and funniest talks we have all had in ages! We laughed so hard our sides ached! Sar' and Mom had Liz and I in fits with their pregnancy stories. How funny it can be! I don't think we've all sat and laughed that way for months! It was a special, girly time for us with our Mama. She is so wise and fun and darling! I love her so! :D And I'm so thankful for her! and while I'm at it, I love those sisters too! What a blessing to have so many built in best friends! :D Any ladies who haven't done it already I would encourage you to make your sisters and Mom your dearest friends! Maybe it takes a while, but its so worthwhile! After all! Who knows you the best! :D
Friday, May 21, 2010
One of my favorite special times with Jesta was when we lived in Tillamook. She had a job and a drivers license way before the rest of us and one night a week, usually on Tuesdays she would take me to the library. We would both pick out a good book and then we would go to Safeway across the street and she would buy us a cinnamon roll to split. We would sit in the car and eat our cinnamon roll together and laugh and sometimes read a bit of our book, but we always had so much fun! It was such an ordinary thing...going to the Library, but Jesta had a knack for making something simple a special treat and I looked forward to it every week. :D
One of her specialty's was sewing. She worked at a fabric store for a while and always brought home all kinds of fascinating things for us to look at... she would then commence sewing them onto her clothing...tiny gems on her jean jacket...an appliqued butterfly on her denim skirt... she was always working delicate threads, beads and darling buttons onto the squares of a crazy quilt. She was extremely talented in this area as well as abundantly patient.
Yes, some days are harder than others, I miss her a lot, our whole family does. We pray for her every day and think about her always and try to take care of her in the best possible ways. Sometimes I'll walk through the room where she lives and I'll find her smiling. I always wonder what brought that sparkling smile to her lips and what her mind has found to think about? I go over by the bed, but she doesn't seem to be looking at me, but past me? Is she remembering too? Is something special or funny passing through her mind? Is she remembering her Saviour? Her King? Did His love and care bring a smile to her mouth? He knows what she's thinking and even when she doesn't see the rest of us, He is with her! I love her so! He loves her so much more! We are so blessed!!!!
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Today I was watching a lecture with my Mom about health, and I learned these decidedly frightening facts about what we eat and the many problems with the Standard American Diet, IE, SAD.
Did you know:
White refined sugar and its relatives: brown sugar, high fructose and regular corn syrup, cane syrup, pasteurized honey, sucrose, etc... are all detrimental to your brain and are considered by many health experts to be just as addictive as common street drugs?
The average American eats 200+ lbs of sugar a year.
Even a small amount of sugar shuts down your immune system for 4 hours! Making you susceptible to any and every germ out there.
The average american teenage boy drinks over 55 oz of soda pop every day
The average american teenage girl drinks over 45 oz of soda pop every day
The primary artificial sweetners in most so called 'diet foods' contain an ingrediant used commonly in ant poisoning.
The craving for chocolate is caused by a magnesium deficiancy in most cases
Splenda is proven to be just as addictive as refined sugars and in some cases even more so
The cells in refined sugars are so small that they are able to penetrate the tissue in the top of your mouth and go right to your brain-
It takes less that 30 minutes for sugar that is in your stomach to reach your brain... and it enters your blood stream already converted to blood sugar, which causes a panic attack of your system and creates what we call a 'sugar high' ...
Refined Sugars literally burn up your brain.
The amount of sugar in a can of soda is equvilent to more that 10 sugar cubes.
There are generally more that 140 differant types of veggies in our grocery stores... did you know that only about 4 of those vegatables are eaten by the American public? How many have you tried?
This is just what I learned this morning... some of it I was already aware of but there was a lot I was not. America is literally poisoning itself! Most of my information here is about sugar, but there are many areas of the food pyramid that we should be enlightened about. Do you know what goes into the average loaf of 'whole wheat' bread on the supermarket shelf... have you read up about the unpronounceable ingredients in most of the deli meats we by? What about hydrogenated oils and fats? Whats wrong with white flour? What about bacon? Have you ever heard of GMO's? Soy? ETC! Lets get active about our health, people! This isn't the way we were created to eat! The Lord created food on our planet first and then we were created. We were designed to fit into His food plan, the food plan wasn't created to cater around us. By trying to do this in our rich ( well, not so much any more )and, pampered country we have become the fattest and most unhealthy nation in the world. Now that's a fact to think about.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
A couple of weekends ago we planned a camping trip for Lizzy's nineteenth birthday. It turned out to be a delightfully dry weekend... a little damp and cool on the first day, but a perfect sunny day the next. :D
You practically always had better start out or end the day with Starbucks... :D It just makes life better!
Mandy came camping with us. She got to spend a lot of time in this chair where she could best stay out of trouble and we could keep an eye on her.
My very pretty sisters with their very pretty smiles!
The Gilliams were able to come spend the day with us....
The two cuties! Its the birthday girl and her special guy! :D
I believe this is the kiss that pacified Richards wrath.... :D ..... And this would be Richards wrath! :D
Smile Guys! You're on film! (Ok, so maybe you're just on my blog!)
The Lord Jesus described the true citizens of the Kingdom of Heaven by a most lovely name...He called them "the blessed ones", or as a quite literal translation would express it, "the happy poeple"; for blessed does mean happy in the sense of being perfectly whole and perfectly in harmony with God's will and purposes for us.
From Hannah Hurnards: "Walking Among the Unseen"
Its a very happy thought to know that the Lord is over all and controls all things. Its somehow a release for our souls to be able to cease from worry, knowing that everything has a design and an end. Maybe the hardest thing is to give up the burden? Sometimes we hold on when we should let go... as his children we aren't supposed to hang on to the load, just put it in His very capable hands. I have to learn to trust him more! Oh to have the faith and trust of Paul and Silas, singing their hearts out to the Lord even in prison! There is an example of a happy (blessed) people! :D
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
She told me about her Gramma, who was apparently her very good friend. Her name was Mary Amanda, and she was a seamstress. Gramma told me about how she taught Sewing and HomeEc at her school and helped her learn to sew. She told about long hours spent hemming the very full skirts of her day, completely by hand. She talked about the lovely things her Gramma used to make and about a very special young woman they knew who had the privilege of having a custom made wedding gown... She said it was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen in her life.
These are all things that I didn't know about my Gramma! It is such a treat now to sit and share a basket of laundry folding together or to wash dishes while she drys. She tells AMAZING stories! Sometimes when we view our grandparents or the elderly we forget that they where young once! They were vital and alive and full of dreams and plans and adventure! If we are blessed with christian grandparents we are also blessed with a wealth of knowledge and wisdom! They have been there! They have experienced it! They know!
My Dad has been encouraging me to spend time with my Gramma and the trunk of pictures that she gave us. I'm supposed to ask my Gramma about the people in the pictures and the stories behind them. I admit that I have been slow about keeping with this, but when I did sit down with her I had filled several notebook pages within a half hour or so. Sometimes she would talk faster than I could write! It was fun and educational and I learned all kinds of things about my extended family! I met my great grandparents through a picture of them standing outside of there very cute home. I met my Gramma's best friend posing in a darling, now vintage dress, and I got to see a picture of my very handsome Grampa in his military uniform. I wish I could get the pictures on here for you to see! Sometime soon hopefully!
But really my point in posting is to encourage us all to take a little time for the elderly! Even if your grandparents aren't around maybe you could volunteer at a nursing home or retirement center. From my experience they are ALWAYS willing and excited to visit with you! Often they love to share stories and fun facts about times they lived through... take notes and write a paper! Learn! Its so exciting!!! Even if you aren't writing papers or volunteering just taking the time to spend a few extra minutes with the elderly in your circle will greatly bless your heart!
Thursday, April 29, 2010
My Gramma gets up every morning with a beautiful smile. Her sleepy eyes crinkle and she always greets us with the happiest heart! One of my goals is to be "predictably cheerful"..... we probably all have a friend or family member we can think of who tends in this direction. No matter how you find them, when you call them or at any time you see them, they are sweet and cheerful, even if things don't seem to be going their way. If you live with someone like this, one of the first things you see of them in the morning is their sparkling smile and the last thing at night is a cheerful goodnight, and a hug, that makes you feel special just because you know its genuine and full of love. Im not talking about a sort of fake sweetness or a forced happy face... it has to be hard somtimes, but the truely cheerful person gets that beautiful and contagious cheer from a heart that is thankful and peaceful. Just giving thanks for all the blessings that the Lord provides every day should be enough to put a contented smile on our face!
So clear away the blues or thoughts that bring you down, anything that shouldn't be on your mind anyway, and as my Mama always reminds me think on the lovely, pure, praiseworthy, etc... things that are mentioned in Philipians 4:8! The things that aren't of this earth but of above! And by all means count those blessings, and rejoice! Thank you're heavanly Father! What and abundant life He has given us! :D
Monday, April 19, 2010
~For the constant and effectual prayer of the righteous man availeth much~
Sometimes as a young woman in our culture ,it seems to me, to be completely overwhelming to see the world going on around me as it does. We hear on the news about the terrible decisions our government makes every day, we see articles, advertisements and pictures everywhere that openly boast our country's obsession with wealth, beauty, possessions and a myriad of other things that don't count for anything in God's eyes! It can all be so very frustrating and lately it had left me feeling helpless! What can we do to change things!
Tonight while I was reading a book by Debi Pearl (highly recommend this author by the way) an answer came to mind immediately! She was talking about being "prayer warriors". I confess I had never heard of being a prayer warrior before, but it sounded strong and exciting so I kept reading. As prayer warriors the Lord can use us to help others! We can be fighting for our families, for our leaders, for our country! We can be waging the war from our own homes by taking the time to beseech the Lord on their behalf! Probably we've often prayed for our families and close friends or the missionaries overseas, etc... and those are all WONDERFUL things! Continue doing so! But how about our leaders! We can start with the leaders in our own home...our fathers, brothers, husbands! They are often the ones to enter the world every day through the work force...they are the ones who leave their homes everyday to fight for their families! We should be actively and constantly praying for them to be strong and courageous warriors for the Lord as they fight through the evil they deal with every day! Recently it came to my mind, that my Dad goes to work five days a week from early morning until late afternoon and fights for us! He works hard to provide and take care of us and I can't remember him once ever complaining! He has seen his hard earned wages buy us clothes and food and home throughout the years and he smiles and hugs and says he loves us! What better testimony is there!
So what can I do? I can pray for him! I can pray every day, twice a day! As often as I can! It really is such a huge thing! Through our prayers for our leaders at home we are affecting all the people our leader runs into throughout the day! Lets pray for him to be a powerful soul winner for the Lord! Just by his godly actions and wise decisions he is testimony of God's grace and power! The Lord can use him mightily and we can help! I encourage you to find a place to go to daily, and spend time there praying! Pray for all those leaders you know! Lift them up to the Lord and pray that the Lord will use them, that they would have strength and be courageous for Him! The turnaround of a nation starts with the nations families. This is something we can do! Lets be warriors for our King!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
Yay its day three for my new commitment to eat better! Things have been going well, so far. I got through the weekend and as we all know that can be a huge challenge since we too often just let it all go as the busyness of weekend even so much as approaches. :) So I'm very thankful to the Lord that he helped me so abundantly! I was even able to turn down Strawberry Rhubarb Pie and vanilla ice cream, on Sunday afternoon! No boasting intended either! I'm just completely thankful for the Lord's help in keeping my commitments. It can be so hard sometimes!
This morning while I was looking up verses on contentment I found myself in Philippians 4:11-13
....for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.
~ Contentment really does apply to all areas of our lives! Could it be that it even apply's to what we eat? I think that it really does! If Paul could be content to go hungry than surely I can be content to choose and eat the foods that are good for my body! Why, really that isn't a sacrifice at all compared to going hungry! Its a chance rather to practice self control and contentment...being satisfied :D
Contentment: Rest or quietness of the mind in the present condition; Satisfaction which holds the mind in peace, restraining complaint, opposition, or further desire, and often implying a moderate degree of happiness.
~ Websters Dictionary
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Sometimes I feel like being diligent is the hardest thing in the world! Ever since the age of about 10 I have been conscience of what I put in my mouth...whether or not its healthy, etc... I read a lot of books through high school about health and nutrition and was always eager to put it into practice. Lately however I seem to have become a little slack in this area... not being consistent at all.
So I've decided to start working on it again. I decided that for 2 months I will not eat these things:
Oils (with the exception of high quality flax and olive oil)
Milk ( unless its whole and raw )
Sweets (No white refined sugar or products made with them )
White Refined Flour or flour products ( includes pasta)
I have noticed such a change in how I feel after only having been off these things for a couple days. My stomach feels great! I had noticed that when I was eating a lot of pasteurized dairy products and refined flours and sugars that I was constantly feeling ill. My tummy felt uncomfortable and I often felt listless and irritable.
Here are the things that I have decided, after doing some research, that I would still enjoy :
All fruits and veggies fresh or frozen- canned items lose to many vitamins
Chicken /Beef/ and Fish
Beans and Rice
Oat and nut milks: our family has tried a delicious oat and hazelnut milk that is organic and very satisfying
Raw, organic milk
Organic Yogurt ( contains probiotics and live cultures) Sooo good for you!
Whole grain bread and pasta ( In moderation)
There are lots of other things that I probably haven't mentioned here, but my goal is to eat things as close to the way God created them as possible. Organic foods are a bit more expensive, but my parents have decided that they are worth it. They are so much more flavorful and good for you and your not putting all those nasty chemicals and gmo's into your body.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Today I was so tired...The pup woke us up last night at about 2 am and kept waking us up every few hours afterwards. I'd been dragging all day, but I just needed to run to the grocery store really quick and I would be done for the evening. I finished buying my groceries, jumped into the car to begin backing out, my thoughts all on heading straight home and having a few minutes to catch a quick nap before I would help Mama with dinner. However as I backed out into the main lane of the parking lot I felt a bump and heard someone blaring a horn. I sighed feeling annoyed as I looked into my rear veiw mirror and saw a tiny silver VW Bug sitting right behind me. I pulled back into my parking space and got out of the car. My attitude was huffy as I walked over to the tiny middle aged blonde lady inspecting her little car. "What had she been doing just lingering right behind me! " I thought- what she said I would never have expected! She was kind and sweet and exhibited a very Christlike attitude! She asked me if I was okay and as we examined both cars we realized there was no damage. She calmed my irritation in only a moment with her gentle voice and seemed more concerned for me and my car than for her own which probably had cost much more.
As we parted ways and I returned to the driver seat I felt like bursting in to tears! Here was such a good example of that verse in Proverbs! There I was tired and grumpy and irritated and ready to defend myself with all might, and there she was just completely kind and humble and more concerned for others that herself! What an example! I feel like the little blond lady taught me such a huge lesson and I don't even know her name! I'm thankful that the Lord sent her along to show me the beauty of kindness and gentle answers and how they can turn what could be a nasty situation into a lesson for a tired grumpy person. I hope that should there ever be a next time, I can have such a Christ like attitude!
Monday, March 15, 2010
With the week just beginning today I was reflecting on how nice a weekend had just passed. Weekends are always the best part of the week and always kind've like a mini holiday!
Like every holiday there is always family or friends around....There's the family members that generally take a nap:
And there are the friends who are like family members:
And there are the ones always ready for a group hug!
Also, continuing on in true holiday fashion, there is always the GREAT food :D
This weekend there was hand rolled toquitos, homemade cream cheese Jalapeno Poppers:
And the fresh Guacamole (hand chopped and diced courtesy of Richard:D )
Endeavoring To Use The Time Wisely
He always has a plan if we will but let Him Guide!
Ever since I quit my job last year and came home to be with my family as my parents suggested, I had been a little discontent. I'm an active person by nature I think, and all of my jobs since high school had kept me practically on the run much of the time. When I came home it was easy to stay busy at first...learning to keep up with household chores, getting into the swing of things and relearning "home routine", but after that was accomplished I found myself wondering what to do with myself next! The Bible instructs us to "redeem the time" and to "not eat the bread of idleness", and as those verses kept popping up again and again I found them convicting me terribly! I didn't feel neccesarliy idle... I still had daily work to do, I just wanted to use my free time in productive ways that were honoring to the Lord! I'd never really had much free time to think about before! And now here it was staring me in the face every day after 2 pm! For a while I prayed about it, read up on it, asked people about it, but I didn't seem to be getting any answers in that direction, until one day I was talking to my aunt and she suggested I call and talk to a young woman she knew who might have some good ideas. I don't know why, but I procrastinated on that phone call for about a week... finally last Tuesday I felt prompted more than ever to call this young woman. I must say that it was one of the most encouraging visits ever! I was so blessed and thankful as she talked to me for over an hour and a half, telling me about her single years (she is now married), how she usefully employed her time, her home business, the ministry opportunities she was able to be involved in, etc... One of the biggest points she brought across was prayer! So that very day I started to pray about what I could do and that the Lord would bring about opportunities for ministry. Right away he laid upon my heart, the ministry I already have at home: the blessing of being able to help care for Majesta and my Gramma Evelyn.
There really is so much truth in the saying:"Bloom where you're planted"!( Now for the patience and diligence to continue blooming! ) Soon, within the week actually, He brought even more opportunities...things I would never have thought of! Friends began suggesting things out of the blue! It was so exciting! Also the Lord layed upon my heart the ministry I have even with my own sisters! Being an example for Liz, helping Sarah now that she's pregnant. There seemed to be opportunity knocking in every direction and I was thrilled!
In short I'm so looking forward to the months and years ahead. It seems as though the Lord has made clear to my heart recently how very precious His plans are for us and I feel so thankful and blessed and excited for life!
Yet He has not left Himself without testimony: He has shown kindness by giving you rain from the heaven and crops in their seasons. He provides you with plenty of food and fills your hearts with joy .
I will rejoice greatly in the Lord, My soul will exult in my God...
And whatever your hand finds to do, do it with ALL you're might.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
It was so completely pleasant to drive into the drive way and be met with hugs and kisses. We all went into the house, and it was the best feeling in the world to be home.... All the right smells and sounds! The best people in the world gathered around! Even the dogs barking couldn't annoy me that night! I was completely exhausted, but completely happy! It had been awhile since I'd been away for longer than a night or so and lately I hadn't really been appreciating how sweet home is! In fact, quite honestly, I had been complaining about it some and feeling a bit frustrated with the work, but over the retreat I had time to think about it and found myself missing it! I know now that the Lord used that time to refresh my spirit and show me what a great blessing he has given me In my family and home. I continued to be refreshed even after returning home, and for the first time in a very long time I felt contented! Everything seems right even if its hard and I'm glad that I can be a daughter at home helping my family! I'm so blessed that the Lord has given me this place in life at this time.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Last night before I went to bed I picked up an old book we have by Kathleen Norris. It is simply titled :"Mother". I didn't have time to read it all over again so I just flipped to the last couple of chapters and started reading. I've read the book several times before, but it had been so long that I didn't remember it. I do have a terrible habit of not reading a book all the way through and just reading the last few chapters to see what happens. My friend Emily calls it cheating. :D But as I sat reading the last chapter of the book I started to cry... it was just so precious! I wondered: do we ever take the time just to think about our mothers? All that they have given up? All that they are? All that they've done for us through the years? All the love, the care, planning, and praying and working, the time they've spent raising us up to be godly women? What sacrifices did mama make? It caused me to think...and to be so very, very grateful for my own beautiful and wonderful mother!
Here is an excerpt from the book...it is a little lengthy, but so beautiful as the young woman begins to see, that out of all the traveled, wealthy and astounding women she has ever met her mother, humble and godly, outshines them all.
In just a few short days, she realized with vague wonder, her slowly formed theories had been set at naught; her whole philosophy turned upside down, and, at last, everything seemed right. Had these years of protest and rebellion done no more than to lead her in a wide circle, past empty gain and joyless mirth and the dead fruit of riches and idleness, back to her mother's knees again? She had met brilliant women, rich women, courted women-but where among them was one whose face had ever shone as her Mother's had shone today? The over dressed, idle dowagers; the matrons with their too-gay frocks, their too-full days, their too-rich food; the girls all crudeness, artifice, all scheming openly for their own advantage-where among them all was happiness? Where among them all was one who whom Margaret had heard say- as she had heard her mother say so many, many times -"Children, this is a happy day,"-"Thank God for a another lovely Sunday all together,"-"Isn't it lovely to get up and see the sun shining?"-Isn't delightful to come home hungry to such a nice dinner?
And what a share of happiness her mother had given the world! How she had planned and worked for them all-....She thought of all the Christmas mornings and the stuffed stockings at the fireplace that proved every childish wish remembered, every little hidden hope guessed! And how her face would beam as she sat at the breakfast table, enjoying her belated coffee, after the cold walk to church, and responding warmly to the onslaught of kisses and hugs that added fresh color to her cold, rosy cheeks! What a mother she was! ....."How happy we all were!" Margaret thought; "and how she worked for us! "
And suddenly theory and speculation ended, and she knew. She knew that faithful, self-forgetting service and the love that spends itself over and over, only to be renewed again and again, are the secret to happiness. For another world, perhaps leisure and beauty and luxury- but in this one, " Whosoever loses his life shall gain it." Margaret knew now that her Mother was not only the truest, the finest, the most generous woman she had ever known, but the happiest as well.
She thought of other women like her mother; she suddenly saw Mary Page, plodding home from the long day at the library desk to her little cottage and crippled sister at night, always made one feel the better and happier for meeting her.
Mrs. Carboldt's days were crowded to the last instant, it was true; but what an illusion it was, after all, Margaret said to herself in all honesty, to humor her little fancy that she was a busy woman! Milliner, manicure, butler, chef, club, card table, tea table, -these and a thousand things like them filled her day, and they might all be swept away in an hour and leave no one the worse for it! Suppose Mrs. Carboldt's own final summons came; there would be a little flurry throughout the great establishment, legal matters to settle, notes of thanks to be written for flowers. Margaret could imagine Victoria and Harriet, awed but otherwise unaffected, home from school in midweek, and to be sent back before the next Monday. Their lives would go on unchanged. Their mother had never buttered bread for them, never searched for their boots and hats, never watched their work and play and called them to her knees for praise and blame. Mr. Carboldt would have his club, his business, his yacht and motor cars-He was well accustomed to living in cheerful Independence of family claims.
But life without Mother! In a sick moment of revelation, Margaret saw it. She saw them gathering in the horrible emptiness and silence of the house Mother had kept so warm and bright. She saw her fathers stooping shoulders and trembling hands. She saw her sisters, red-eyed, white cheeked in fresh black-she seemed to hear the low toned voices that would break over and over again so cruelly into sobs. What could they do-who could take up the work she had laid down-who would watch and plan and work for them all now? Margaret thought of the empty place at the table, the room that after all these years, would no longer be "Mother's room".
Oh, no-no-no! She began to cry softly in the dark. How ungrateful she had been;how ugly and cross and unwilling to help.God willing they would hold Mother safe with them for many years. She would live to see some of the fruits of her long labor of love. She should know that with every fresh step in life, with every deepening experience, her children grew to love her better;turned to her more and more! There would come a day- Margaret thrilled to the thought-when little forms would run ahead of John and herself up the worn path, and when their children would be gathered into her mothers experienced arms! Did life hold a more exquisite moment, she wondered, than that in which she would hear her mother praise them? All her old castles in the air seemed cheap and tinseled tonight beside these tender dreams that had their roots in the real truths of life. Travel and position, gowns and motor cars and,yachts and country houses, these things were to be bought in all their perfection by the highest bidder, and always would be. But love and character and service, home and the wonderful charge of little lives-the "pure religion breathing household laws" that guided and perfected the whole-these were not to be bought;they were only to be prayed for, worked for and bravely won.
"God has been very merciful to me", Margaret said to herself seriously; and in the her own childish fashion she made some new resolves. If joy came she would share it as far as she could; if sorrow she would show her mother that she was not all unworthy of her. Tomorrow she would go to see her sister Julie. Dear sweet Ju, whose heart was so full of the the little Margaret! Margaret had a sudden tender memory of the days when Theodore and Duncan and Bob were all babies in turn. Her mother would gather the little daily supply of fresh clothes from the bureau and chest every morning and carry the little bathtub into the sunny nursery window and sit there with only a bobbing downy head and waving pink fingers visible from the great warm bundle of bath apron....Ju would be doing that now...
And she had sometimes wished, or half formed the wish, that she and Bruce had been the only ones! Yes, came the sudden thought, but it wouldn't have been Bruce and Margaret after all. It would have been Bruce and Charlie.
With a sickening thud of her heart, Margaret understood. That was what women did, then, when they denied the right to life of life to the distant, unwanted, possible little person! Calmly, constantly, in all placid philosophy and self justification, they kept from the world-not only the troublesome new baby, with his tears and his illness and his endless claim on mind and body and spirit-but perhaps the glowing beauty of a Rebbecca, the buoyant indomitable spirit of a small Robert, whose grip on life, whose energy and ambition were as strong as Margaret's own!
Margaret stirred uneasily and frowned in the dark. It seemed perfectly incredible, it seemed perfectly impossible that if Mother had had only two-and how many thousands of women didn't have that! - she, Margaret, a pronounced and separate entity, traveled and ambitious and to become the wife of one of the world's greatest men, might not have been lying here in the summers night.....
Her children arise and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praises her;"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all." Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting:but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the fruit of her hands and let her own works praise her at the city gate.
Monday, February 15, 2010
My life is but weaving
Betwix the Lord and me;
I do not choose the color
He worketh steadily.
Off times He weaveth sorrow
And I in foolish pride;
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.
Nor till the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Shall God unroll the canvas
And explain the reason why,
The dark threads are as needfull
In the Weavers skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned.
Grant Colfax Tullar
"For Great is the Lord and Greatly to be praised.... "
1 Chronicles 16:25
"For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope."
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Yesterday I went for a walk with Lizzie.
I was a little concerned when we started out that it was going to rain, but sometimes the desire for fresh air and the need for stretching cramped muscles, cancels out the thoughts of discomfort that arise from the consideration of getting caught in what seems will be an unavoidable rain storm.
But after all we do live in Oregon, so off we trotted, dogs on both sides of us pointing their noses to the pavement as they struggled to decipher what smells might be there. We laughed at Mee mee, the brown cocker puppy, as she pranced along beside me, a perfect picture of sweetness, reminding me of the the children's movie; "Lady and the Tramp". Nola, however seems to have a strange fascination/disregard, for the command "Heel". I had to laugh inwardly as Lizzie sternly set forth the command... She either ignored it completely, continuing on her way with a happy dog smile, or slowed down momentarily at the tug of her collar, only to bounce around like a mad dog at Lizzie's side or to sneakily press forward a minuscule amount at a time looking back over her shoulder randomly to see if her master would notice.
We wondered around in the neighborhood for a time but continued walking until we were well on the outskirts of town and traveling down a gravel road, bordered on both sides by filbert orchards. We were enjoying the freshness of the day, the wonderful smells, balmy breezes and brief, but warming sun breaks, when I was suddenly jerked forward, out of my comfortable walk, by an over eager Mee mee, suddenly finding an odd excitement in the chasing of gravel that was being thrown around by our shoes. It was the funniest thing to watch....as though each piece of gravel represented a ball that needed to be chased until caught between her paws. Yes, very funny at first, but rapidly becoming annoying, as she lunged ahead every few seconds. No command to stop or to heel would phase her and I was thrilled to finally return to pavement where she happily resumed her normal prance.
Today Liz gave Nola a bath...we are going to the beach tomorrow and Liz wanted her to come. I told her absolutely not, in my car, unless she gave her a bath and brushed her. I had sort of hoped that the idea of hauling the huge dog into the tub and cleaning up the mess afterward would make her less enthusiastic, but instead she happily agreed and off she went.
The sounds I heard coming from the upstairs bathroom did not sound like pleasant ones for man or beast! There was thumping and scurrying on the linoleum as Nola attempted to jump out of the tub and made it only part way, and then there was the frequent;"NO, NO!!!! Bad Dog!!!! " from Lizzie as she struggled to keep the beast from pushing her into the bathtub as well. I peeked in at one point to find Liz sitting on the side of the tub, Nola practically in her lap and the walls and floor plastered with dog hair. Already plastered, mind you- and the dog not even out of the tub yet!
I couldn't imagine that giving that dog a bath could be at all fun, but both came down stairs an hour later looking as happy as they could possibly be. If Nola could laugh I'm sure she would have then. They rolled around in the dining room for awhile playing a game of, whatever its called when the human trys to brush and the dog trys to get away? Jacob the white cocker looked disdainfully down from the grooming table where Mama was brushing him, as if to say "we spaniels are above such things. " You have to smile as you think about what a dog might say if he only he could. :D
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