Beauty is not so much what you see, but what you dream.
~Old Proverb~

Friday, May 21, 2010

I Love You!

Last Sunday it had been 3 years since Jesta's accident... today I started missing her again. I always miss her in a way....but some days I miss her very much, usually when something strikes up a memory that touches my heart. Today it was because I sat down to read a book and I suddenly thought of how much she would have loved to read it. I think I've mentioned before how much she loved to read.

One of my favorite special times with Jesta was when we lived in Tillamook. She had a job and a drivers license way before the rest of us and one night a week, usually on Tuesdays she would take me to the library. We would both pick out a good book and then we would go to Safeway across the street and she would buy us a cinnamon roll to split. We would sit in the car and eat our cinnamon roll together and laugh and sometimes read a bit of our book, but we always had so much fun! It was such an ordinary thing...going to the Library, but Jesta had a knack for making something simple a special treat and I looked forward to it every week. :D

One funny thing that I remember about Jesta was her very adamant dislike of exercise... some exercises she disliked more than others, but mainly she rather hated them all. :D

One time however, I talked her into doing a Pilate's class at the YMCA in Tillamook, where I worked as lifeguard. We got an employees discount and a membership discount, and so it was really far to good an offer to pass up! She finally agreed and we vigilantly went to the class every other day for a month. I can't even begin to explain about the horrible pain in the first week, but it was soon gone and the class began to be a special time that we could enjoy together. Sarah, Liz, and Mom joined also and every Monday, Wednesday, Friday we would look forward to the class. We( Sarah, Liz and I) would sometimes break out into fits of laughter during class because the instructor had such a funny Hispanic/french accent. :D She was hilarious and often said "boing" rather than "point" if you can imagine that. Jesta kept telling us to hush, but I know she was laughing too! :D

One of her specialty's was sewing. She worked at a fabric store for a while and always brought home all kinds of fascinating things for us to look at... she would then commence sewing them onto her clothing...tiny gems on her jean appliqued butterfly on her denim skirt... she was always working delicate threads, beads and darling buttons onto the squares of a crazy quilt. She was extremely talented in this area as well as abundantly patient.
She was an artist with an embroidery needle and created all sorts of lovely things. She tried to teach me to quilt once or twice...I think I was pretty impatient and now I wish I had taken the time to learn more.

She's such a beautiful person with such a big heart for other people. She loved children and making new friends and she loved we sisters. She was an excellent big sister! She could play the violin very well and when we were in high school, with Sarah on her flute and me on the piano, we would have concerts in our living room for our parents, or for guests sometimes. I never really enjoyed playing in front of people other than my family, but Jesta never minded and that gave me confidence. Now I look back and am so glad we made those memories!

Yes, some days are harder than others, I miss her a lot, our whole family does. We pray for her every day and think about her always and try to take care of her in the best possible ways. Sometimes I'll walk through the room where she lives and I'll find her smiling. I always wonder what brought that sparkling smile to her lips and what her mind has found to think about? I go over by the bed, but she doesn't seem to be looking at me, but past me? Is she remembering too? Is something special or funny passing through her mind? Is she remembering her Saviour? Her King? Did His love and care bring a smile to her mouth? He knows what she's thinking and even when she doesn't see the rest of us, He is with her! I love her so! He loves her so much more! We are so blessed!!!!


  1. Oh Trin, you did a wonderful job writing this! I loved reading the memories.

  2. What a blessing to read this Trin! I miss her too! <3